Memorial Service
For
Ralph Gerhardt
6.6.1967 - 9.11.2001

Vice-President, Derivative Products
Cantor, Tower 1, 105th. Floor
New York, NY
Advent Lutheran Church of New York
Monday, September 24. 2001

I am Ralph's Dad. I am speaking on behalf of the Gerhardt family.

Ralph called me on the 11th. at 852am. He was calm, but very serious.

"Dad, something happened at the World Trade Center. A bomb or plane hit the building. I am okay. We are okay. I love you, but I have to go now. We are evacuating the building. Talk to you later."
That call never came. Ralph was on the 105th. Floor of Tower 1. He was working for Cantor Fitzgerald as Vice President of Derivatives for the past year and a half. Prior to that, he was working for them in the Toronto office.

Meeting with company officials and other grieving family members, and understanding the structure of the building and where the plane impacted, we have come to the difficult conclusion that not one person from the company's 730 employees, nor anyone above the 91st. floor, made it out alive. This includes our son, Ralph, and his lady friend, Linda Luzzicone, who also worked on the same floor.

We met Linda and we know that they had a wonderful relationship. Linda's Dad, another Ralph, told me that Linda never looked happier than in the past months. We can only hope that they were together in their final moments.

Linda's family is present here tonight and our heart goes out to them.

* * *
We saw a lot of Ralph and Linda these past months. As a matter of fact, they visited us in Toronto over the Labour Day weekend, and I visited them here in New York the weekend prior.

Helga talked daily with Ralph in New York and Stephan in Washington, DC. Many times I complained about that, seeing the monthly phone bill. Today, I am glad she did not listen to me! One never knows if or when you will see or talk to each other again

Ralph had that special quality in all of his relationships, to make every moment special. In our daily phone calls or visits, there was always a hug and an "I love you, Mom" and "I love you, Dad."

Sometimes, he scared the heck out of his mother - and even me!

As a small child, he made it difficult for me to discipline him. Instead of staying in bed, he would sit atop the staircase and send down paper planes with messages written on them -- how much he loves us and he misses us.

He got us into trouble with other parents by licking other kids ice cream, because he was not allowed to one himself.

I remember one Christmas when he was around 5 years old. Ralph and his brother, Stephan, were fighting over which TV program to watch. You have to remember, this was before remote controls. One after the other took turns switching channels. Listening to this next door, I finally went over and with a stern warning; I suggested to them to agree on one channel. "If you break my TV, I will sell all your Christmas presents and buy myself a new TV! Is that clear?"

As I turned and left the room, I heard Ralph whisper to Stephan, "I hope he buys a color TV!"

Before Ralph received his driver license, I must have had the cleanest car in the neighbourhood. My car was driven up and down our driveway whenever the sun changed. And God forbid it rained or a leaf fell on the hood, the car had to be washed!

One day, I discovered with shock that Ralph had tried to trace a wire for the power antenna and had taken out all the seats out of my Cadillac -- carpets and everything! I had no idea how to put it back together and reconnect everything. Confidently; he assured me he could. And he did!

When we built our first house on Lake Simcoe, Ralph became our general contractor during his summer break from university and his mother his subcontractor. I never really figured out how much the house cost me. Ralph and Helga had all the basics implemented in this beautiful house. Priority number one: A boat! "A gift for Dad." Dad sure needed one. However, I did no see much of the boat whenever Ralph was around.

And while we don't have that house anymore, we still have the sign -- "The Four G's." The sign will be kept forever and is now hanging on our little townhouse in the country.

Ralph's glass was always half full. And if he ever was in doubt, he would waive the waiter to top it of.

Stephan said the other day, "He lived to live!" How true. We always joked that last year Ralph made his first million -- the problem was; that it costs him a million and half.

Today, I am standing here in front of you to celebrate Ralph's young life. And a celebration it is. Ralph was in a place he loved, his friends, his apartment, his neighbours, and his neighbourhood. Your city has been so special to us in these difficult days. As a New Yorker, you have great reasons to be proud.

In any family one tries to build a foundation of love and trust. One can't see if one did achieve that goal until a crisis arises. Today this foundation is visible to us and to the world. Strangers have hugged us, gave us flowers, flags, prayed, and cried with us and offered any help we may need, And if one says today, "I love New York," it takes on a whole different meaning.

On behalf of the Gerhardt family, I can proudly say to you, "I love New York."

We had received a report that Ralph had been found and was okay. Excited, I ran over to the Armory and a detective by the name of John Trimmer helped me during these trying hours of fading hope. Last Saturday, his wife, Sue, came to Linda's memorial because John was working. John is here tonight.

John, we are very grateful to you and your thousands of colleagues at the NYPD, New York fire fighters and emergency workers.

* * *
Your leaders in local, state and federal politics have touched us, hugged us, held our hands and included us in their prayers. Governor Pataki, General McGuire, President Clinton and so many other leaders have met us, but if I have to single out one person, it is a special friend of our family, your Secretary of State of New York, Randy Daniels.

Randy is here tonight and he took time from his busy schedule to be with us tonight and to give us solace. Randy, we thank you.

Randy, please pass on to your leaders and your team how much we appreciate all your efforts. You have a wonderful spirit in your beautiful country and as Canadians, we are especially thankful for your warm hospitality at these difficult times.

We have to thank the Canadian General Consul, Michael Phillips and his team for their assistance and their presence here tonight.

Stephan's friends at the Consulate and Canadian Tourism Commission, especially Melissa, Deana and Brian.

Our old Toronto friend and colleague, now here in New York at the Essex House, Ibrahim Fahmy, his family and his fine staff.

Helga and I, while in deep sorrow of loosing our son, we are at peace. We had a wonderful human being as our son and we had a true quality relationship with him. Whatever a parent must say to their child, we shared that with him, and we feel that Ralph did the same with us.

Stephan and Ralph, living miles apart to, also treasured their relationship and it was a very loving one.

We will deeply miss Ralph, but we are so comforted by our vivid memories of Ralph, seeing how our son treated his friends and colleagues.

Today, he would asks us to get strength from these memories. Also to think of his colleagues and their grieving families. He would ask us to celebrate with you, his friends, present here tonight, the ones in Toronto, Germany and in other parts of the world.

I am asking you to join us and do the same. Since Helga and I cannot have our son back, we will do anything in the world to have him remembered. And I am certain you will do the same.

I thank you on behalf of my family and on behalf of Linda's. However, a couple of special thank yous have to be given to:

All of you and your families. We thank you

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