I am Ralph's Dad.

And I am speaking on behalf of the Gerhardt family.

Ralph called me on the 11th. At 852am.

He was calm, but very serious.

"Dad, something happened at the World Trade Center.

A bomb or plane hit the building.

I am okay. We are okay.

I love you, but I have to go now.

We are evacuating the building.

Talk to you later."

That call never came.

Ralph was on the 105th. Floor of Tower 1.

He was working there for Cantor Fitzgerald as Vice President of Derivatives for the past year and a half.

Prior to that, he was working for them in the Toronto office.

Meeting with company officials and other grieving family members,

And understanding the structure of the building and where the plane impacted,

We have come to the difficult conclusion that not one person from the company's 733 employees, nor anyone above the 91st. floor, made it out alive.

This includes our son, Ralph, and his lady friend, Linda Luzzicone, who also worked on the same floor.

We met Linda and we know that they had a wonderful relationship.

Linda' Dad had told me that Linda never looked happier than in the past months.

We can only hope that they were together in their final moments.

 
We saw a lot of Ralph and Linda these past months.

As a matter of fact, they visited us in Toronto over the Labour Day weekend,

And I visited them in New York the weekend prior.

Helga talked daily with Ralph in New York and with Stephan in Washington, DC.

And many times did I complained about that, seeing the monthly phone bill.

Today, I am glad she did not listen to me!

One never knows if or when you will see or talk to each other again

 
Ralph had that special quality in all of his relationships, to make every moment special

And to make it count.

 
Your letters, cards and e-mails refer to that

And you also refer to his beautiful smile

 
In our daily phone calls or visits, there was always a hug and an

"I love you, Mom"

And

"I love you, Dad."

Sometimes, however, he scared the heck out of his mother - and even me!

• His bunjee jumping adventures;
• His cliff diving;
• Showing me pictures of my "airborne" ski boat and how it can "fly;"
• [This came a year and half after confiding this proudly to his mother first.]
• His deep sea diving hobby
• And his latest caper
• Getting his "shark feeder" license.

As a small child he made it difficult for me to discipline him.

Instead of staying in bed, he would sit atop the staircase and send down paper planes with messages written on them -

How much he loves us and how he misses us.

Or sending the dog over to us with similar messages tied to his collar

 
He got us into trouble with other parents too

By licking other kids ice cream, because he was not allowed to one himself.

I remember one Christmas when he was around 5 years old.

Ralph and his brother, Stephan, were fighting over which TV program to watch.

You have to remember, this was before remote controls.

One after the other took turns switching channels.

Listening to this next door, I finally went over

And with a stern warning;

I suggested to them to agree on one channel.

And

"If you should break my TV, I will sell all your Christmas presents and buy myself a new TV!

Is that clear?"

As I turned and left the room, I heard Ralph whisper to Stephan,

"I hope he buys a color TV!"

 
Before Ralph received his driver license, I must have had the cleanest car in the neighborhood.

For any excuse, my car was driven up and down our driveway

And God forbid it rained

Or

A leaf fell on the hood,

The car had to be washed!

 
One day, Idiscovered with shock that Ralph,

He was around 13,

he had tried to trace a wire for the power antenna and had taken out all the seats out of my Cadillac -

Carpets and everything!

I had no idea how to put it back together and reconnect everything.

Confidently; he assured me he could.

And he did!

 
When we built our first house on Lake Simcoe,

Ralph became our general contractor during his summer break from university

and his mother his subcontractor.

I never really figured out how much the house cost me.

Ralph and Helga had all the basics implemented in this beautiful house.

Priority number one:

A boat!

"A gift for Dad."

Dad sure needed one.

However, I did no see much of the boat whenever Ralph was around.

 
And while we don't have that house anymore, we still have the sign -

"The Four G's."

This sign will be kept forever and is now hanging on our townhouse in the country.

 
Ralph's glass was always half full.

And if he ever was in doubt,

he would waive the waiter to top it of.

 
Stephan said the other day, "He lived to live!"

How true.

 
We always joked that last year Ralph made his first million -

the problem was; that it costs him a million and half.

 
Today, I am standing here in front of you to celebrate Ralph's young life.

And a celebration it is.

Ralph was in a place he loved,

his friends,

his apartment,

his neighbours,

and his neighbourhood.

 
And people loved Ralph

When picking up his last laundry

Or his car

Walking by his neighborhood favorite Restaurant

Or Ray's Piazza

Adam, Mike, Theresa and others

Hugged us and cried with us

"Oh no, not our Ralph!"

New York City has been so special to us in these difficult days.

New Yorkers have great reasons to be proud.

And we as Canadians should be proud to have such compassionate neighbors

Brothers and sisters.

 
In any family one tries to build a foundation of love and trust.

One can't see if one did achieve that goal until a crisis arises.

Today this foundation is visible to us and to the world.

Strangers have hugged us,

gave us flowers,

flags,

Teddy Bears

prayed, and cried with us

insisted of paying our bus fares

taxi drivers refused their fare

offered us any help we may need,

And if one says today,

"I love New York,"

it takes on a whole different meaning.

 
On behalf of the Gerhardt family,

I can proudly say to you,

"We love New York."

 
We had received a report that Ralph had been found and was okay.

Excited, I ran over to the Family Assist Center at the Armory

A detective by the name of John Trimmer stayed with me during these trying hours of fading hope, discovering it was not so.

His wife, Sue, came to Linda's memorial apologizing that John was working.

John and Sue did come to Ralph's Memorial in New York

And when we visited Pier 94, John changed his agenda and escorted us to ground Zero

John wanted to be here tonight but could not attend because of his duties.

 
We are very grateful to John and the thousands of colleagues at the NYPD,

 
The New York fire fighters and emergency workers.

* * *

their leaders in local, state and federal politics have touched us,

hugged us,

held our hands

and included us in their prayers.

Governor Pataki,

The Secretary of State Randy Daniels, a personal friend of our family,

General McGuire,

President Clinton

The US Ambassador to Canada

And the many other leaders who met with us and gave us solace,

 
We also extend our gratitute to Prime Minister Chretien and his Delegation

AND

The Canadian Ambassador to the United States

For visiting us in New York and sharing a special moment with us.

The competent and compassionate staff at Washington Embassy

The Canadian New York General Consul and his team for their assistance and offer to help whenever we needed it.

Stephan's friends at the Canadian Tourism Commission in both Cities

A special thank you goes to the Ontario Chief Coroner Dr. Young and his Assistant Dr. McClelland for being so warm and yet informative as what may lay ahead of us

 
Helga and I, while in deep sorrow of loosing our son, we are at peace.

We had a wonderful human being for our son

and we had a true quality relationship with him.

Whatever a parent must say to their child,

we shared that with him,

and we feel that Ralph did the same with us.

Stephan and Ralph, living miles apart to, also treasured their relationship

and it was a very loving one too.

We will deeply miss Ralph, but we are so comforted by our vivid memories of Ralph,

seeing how our son treated you, his friends,

his colleagues

strangers

living beings in general.

• his sense of fairness;
• his passions
• his love and compassion for the very young, the elder and sick;
• his wonderful sense of humor;
• his decency;
• his love for animals;
• his diplomacy;
• his honesty;
• taken responsibility for his action
• his love to live.

Today, I am so deeply reminded by Ralph of the importance to make and give quality time to your loved ones and friends.

 
He would asks us to get strength from these memories.

And he would also ask us to think of his 732 colleagues

and the many other victims

and their grieving families.

He would ask us to celebrate with you, his friends, present here tonight,

the ones in Toronto,

across Canada

Germany, Sweden

and in other parts of the world.

 
I have to give thanks to:

• Ralph's closest friends here in Toronto
• In London, England
• His 3 childhood buddies
• His New York friends
• Stephan's friends from Washington
• Many of you have traveled far
• You have given us so much help and strength
  and even shared a laughter or two in these difficult times
• You know who you are and we are most grateful for all you have done
• Our son Stephan for not only doing his duties,
• but also trying to do mine and his mother and trying to fill the great void Ralph leaves behind,
• We love you son,
• Very much

Father Brad Massman, thank you for letting us celebrate Ralph's life in your beautiful church

And our family friend Robert Pilon for lending his beautiful voice to Ralph's favorite song;

Bring me Home

All of you

And your families.

We thank you